If Dirt+Water=Mud, and Running=Mud, then Dirt+Water=Running?...

Tuesday, March 23, 2010 at 5:54 PM | Posted by Ashy Mike
Not quite. Running does yield mud, but not that kind. This topic is very sensitive to me as I am probably the only person who experiences this more than 50% of days. That's right. I have an uncontrollable bowel movement problem (only when running of course). Honestly, it doesn't matter if I go before or not; Mount Saint Helens can erupt anywhere, anytime. You may think to yourself "Wow, he must really be embarrassed by this!" The fact is that I'm over it and I'd like to share some epic moments with all of you, especially KK.
Now most girls I have met refuse to use porto-johns as they "smell" or are "dirty". Yes, they are gross, but the fact is that men are just too manly for you and will shit anywhere they please. Of course I do not like being seen in this ungodly act, but when you really have to go, it really doesn't matter at that point.

Anyways, growing up in a quaint little Connecticut town with miles and miles of trails, it was not impossible to find somewhere to drop trou (at least once every mile). I can point out hundreds of spots where one should not walk in the woods (or even in the middle of trails and fields). After these luxuries, coming to Worcester put a burden on my training. There are only a handful of places one can safely dump without being prosecuted for indecent exposure, most of these being public restrooms in cafes, gas stations, or Assumption College. However! Today I ran Lost Boys, a 9 1/2 miler with perhaps 2 possible stops on the way: the Worcester JCC and Assumption. Now usually, if not in any rush to get back, I would have opted Assumption as they are always very nice in the fitness center. Well, heavy cramps started kicking in and there was no time to waste, so I waddled my way to the JCC (1/2 mile before Assumption might I add). The woman at the front desk explained that I may only use the restroom if I was escorted. Although weird, I would not have minded if I did not wait 4 minutes for another woman to track down such an "escort". Long story short, I had a very painful 2 1/2 miles back to campus, where I fumigated everyone out of the Harrington bathroom which was to be unoccupied for the next 24 hours due to toxic vapors.

That was probably my least favorite encounter of the second kind. I have tons more, but most aren't really funny (although poop IS funny).

| 1 comments |

Fantastic Eateries

Monday, March 15, 2010 at 8:30 PM | Posted by Ashy Mike
Since today is Monday, I figured it would be most suitable to mention the Restaurant I frequent most often, and always on Monday. For the last seven years, The Boynton Restaurant and Spirits has been visited every Monday by members of the WPI MEN'S Cross Country team. The tradition was founded on account of 10 cent wings. Clearly, there is no reason for poor hungry college students (who burn double the calories of most other poor hungry college students I might add) to attend this delectable weekly event. It still amazes me that after this amazing deal, alum such as Hunter is visibly 25-50 pounds underweight, and other alum (Braga) failed to gain weight until AFTER graduating and not getting cheap wings. Anywho, to make a long story short (TOO LATE), 10 cent wings transformed to 15 cent wings, and was later cancelled on account to lack of income from this special. Nevertheless, the team returned for years, and have been subjected increased prices on their fabulous menu.

So speaking of fabulous menu, The Boynton has many fabulous dishes to offer. I can't really tell you about the standard entrees, as we always get pizza, or burgers if one is unable to find a partner to share with; always a sad night then. Buffalo chicken is always a classic, especially with dill sauce (marinara sucks, McCann is a pussy). Another great is artichoke and red peppers, no matter what Mitch has to say about it. The Boynton special is always a good choice, as it has about 2 pounds of meat per slice, 2.1 if you count the anchovies that make the pizza awesome. The only pizzas I choose not to consume are BLT and mexican, as they both cause horrendous diarrhea without being delicious (and yes, the others cause diarrhea too, but they're delicious so it's okay).


On to the best part... the bar has a huge variety of liquor and 27 beers on tap (with another 33 in bottles). It also supports the local Wachusett Brewery (founded by 3 WPI grads might I add). Whether a night on the town, or a Monday night trip with the buds, The Boynton is a great choice and I give it stars.

| 0 comments |

Ballin' Shoes

Sunday, March 14, 2010 at 4:50 PM | Posted by Ashy Mike
So I was cleaning my pit of a room today when I came across at least 10 pairs of old running shoes among 15 other pairs of footwear. It struck me that Gabe is not the only shoe fanatic in the house. Granted, all of the shoes I own I have worn at one point or another, and I have never ordered used pairs online. Nevertheless, I figured I would exhibit some awesome shoes I wish I owned but don't have the money for (or am too cheap to buy them).

First off, the Ferris Bueller edition Nike Dunks.

This version of the shoe incorporates all the colors of Ferris's outfit from the movie. The leopard print in the laces and tongue really turn the ladies on, and the colors match with any blue jeans or khaki pants.
While on the topic of Nike Dunks, I figured I'd add the Pee Wee Herman Dunks as well.
Now these are rather bland, but notice the red tag on the tongue. For anyone who does not like wearing anything flashy, but still likes being witty, these are the shoes for you.

Of course, no collection would be complete without a pair of Tims. Now I may not look very good in the classic boots, but I might if I got a pair of these bad Larrys. These are the custom Tims with Burberry print; very sexy.
I wouldn't even want to wear these out of the house with fear that they might get scuffed by jealous wannabes.

The last pair for today are by Lacoste.
I can't even describe them, other than by saying that wearing these will get you instantly laid. Of course I don't need the help from shoes, but either way, I would still enjoy the eye fuckage.

Posted In , , | 0 comments |

Most regrettable beverages vol. 1

Friday, March 12, 2010 at 6:13 PM | Posted by Ashy Mike
Now I know what you're thinking. I'm probably gonna say something like "tequila made me vom back into a cup in a bar, so it sucks!" Well, although that may be true, my sole purpose today is to explain to you about an experience I had today, as well as last Sunday morning during the infamous Mcy D's breakfast club gathering.

You would think that a seasonal beverage would be quite awesome, especially when Sir Scott Woodnorth (see tool above) talks it up and brags about his experiences with this so called "treat". Yes, it is March, and yes, I am talking about the one and only Shamrock Shake. This thick and minty mush is extremely rich in leprechauny lusciousness, and makes you feel like a million bucks, until about 2 minutes after consumption. That is, if you get a medium size. A large... forget it, you won't even be able to finish it without vomiting light green lactose all over the poor sucker next to you who is trying not to do the same thing. I also do not recommend mixing this product with peppermint schnapps, as this will only increase chance of vomitation and/or ulcer.


In conclusion, only visit Ronald's house of fun on Sunday mornings, and restrict your beverage diet to coffee or OJ (or if you must, blue powerade).

| 0 comments |

Computer Software of the Week: Volume 1

Thursday, March 11, 2010 at 9:28 AM | Posted by Ashy Mike
I'm adding this for the uplifting sense that computers give us all. Personally, I think we'd all be a lot better if nobody had computers, but yet I can't seem to stay away from mine. For most, it is Facebook and E-mail that run their lives, and that pisses me off like no other. Furthermore, I figured I would share a program that I have had to work with lately for my Grad class. It is called Webmo.
Webmo is an online program that allows one to build and model molecules/atoms/etc. with a server on a different computer. Its just a remote way to use this other machine so the school can lock it away and nobody actually knows where it is. Not only that, but when used in conjunction with a shitty processor, it's more of a pain in the ass than an awesome engineering tool. Don't let me fool you though, there are many sweet things this program can do. Mostly, it helps turn lab rats in chem labs to lab rats in computer labs.
Seriously though, Webmo is pretty sweet. It allows you to do such things as finding optimum geometries for Benzene:


Develop IR Spectra:
Fantasize about women:
And even compare nut sizes. Can you guess who's are the bottom set?

So whether it may be frustrating or not, Webmo offers some sweet stuff that my imagination cannot (like comparing nuts via the web rather than in person).

| 0 comments |

The start of something new

Wednesday, March 10, 2010 at 6:04 PM | Posted by Ashy Mike
So my inspiration for this came from Isaiah Janzen, mountaineer and blogger extraordinaire. This is not just some "Hey, I don't keep in touch with any of my family via telephone so I made a blog for them to check up on me" type of thing, more of a learn from my experiences/thoughts. Entering the last term of college, I have experienced things most middle-age house wives wouldn't dream of, and yet there are things I can only fantasize about because they will just never happen. So either way, this is a way for me to express myself to, since I love doing so.

For those of you who don't know me, I tend to censor myself often because I understand that kids under the age of 8 should not know the word "fuck" (thanks Euge and Troy for shouting this profusely amongst youngsters everywhere). However, I speak my mind and am not afraid to express myself. Some even call me a "gossip-king" if you will. Although this quality may get me into more trouble than I could have wished for, it hurts others more, which still isn't a good thing, but oh well, shit happens.

I usually don't talk very often, but when I start, boy do I start. I can go for days, repeating the same thing over and over. However, I'm also a pretty damn good secret keeper, as long as I know not to say anything (which is rare). But one thing that I can tell you all, that is not a secret, is that I hate two-faces; white knights if you will.
There's nothing worse than someone acting all high and mighty, trying to be best friends with you, with their sole intention being to screw you over. I see right through that shit, and believe me, everyone else does when I blab about my misshaps with them.

What is even worse, is when they don't even give you the decency to flip a coin to decide your fate, and they do it before you walk in the door. I believe we all know who I'm talking about, and he is no four-face, he's just a no good two-face.

Posted In , , , , | 0 comments |

Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)

7 in 7 | Entries (RSS) | Comments (RSS) | Designed by MB Web Design | XML Coded By Cahayabiru.com | Distributed by Deluxe Templates